Q&A: Money from Your In-Laws

Q: My parents are offering my fiancé and I money for a house downpayment, but my boyfriend doesn’t want to owe anything after being married. What do you think?

Dr. Gary Chapman: It sounds like they’re offering you a loan rather than simply giving you the money for the downpayment. I can understand the hesitancy of your boyfriend; he doesn’t want to feel like they’re controlling the marriage. This is a  worthy concern, and I don’t have a right or wrong answer for you. I think it depends on the nature of the relationship. There is nothing morally wrong about accepting money from your in-laws, but if it’s something that will cause contention then it may be wise to politely decline.


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