If you treat all children the same way in an effort to be fair, you are really not being fair at all.
What I discovered years ago is that what makes one child feel loved, does not necessarily make another child feel loved. I like to picture each child as having an emotional ‘love tank’. If the tank is full, that is the child feels loved by the parents, then the child grows up normally. If the tank is empty, the child will grow up with many internal struggles. And in the teenage years they will go looking for love, typically in all the wrong places. Learning what fills your child’s love tank is one of the secrets to successful parenting.
For more, see my new book: The 5 Love Languages of Children