Category: Spirituality

Unrealistic Expectations

Contrary to the opinion of some, sex is not a topic that God finds taboo. In fact, sex was God’s idea. He created us male and female and He instituted marriage with the intent that two would become ‘one flesh’. Why then do so many couples fail to find satisfaction in this important area of marriage? I want to suggest one major reason.

Unrealistic expectations. Films, magazines, and novels convey the idea that sexual thrill and mutual satisfaction are automatic. That is simply not true. God told Israel that a young couple should  ‘take a year’ and learn to pleasure each other. What makes us think that we can do so in less time?

Spring Check-Up

How about a little Spring check-up?  Has it been a good year for you so far? Some of you would say, “Well financially, it hasn’t been a good year.” Others would say, “When it comes to my health, no, it hasn’t been a good year.” Unfortunately, many would say, “For my marriage, it hasn’t been a good year.” Some things are beyond our control. That’s true in the area of finances, health, and relationships.

But always we choose our attitude. Will we curse the darkness or will we light a candle? Will we trust God, or rail out in anger? Why not decide to make this year a year of trusting  God, and asking Him for wisdom in how you can best respond to your present situation. Life with God is always better than traveling alone.

Covenant Keeping

Many people view marriage as a contract. “I’ll do this if you will do that.” But the Bible views marriage as a covenant. “I will look out for your wellbeing no matter how you treat me. I view our marriage as a permanent relationship. I will not walk out on you. Because I love you, I will confront you when I see you doing things that I believe are harmful.

I will speak the truth in love. When you confess wrong doing, I will forgive you and never hold it against you in the future. I am committed to helping you accomplish God’s will for your life. You can count on my support.” Where does one get the heart and the power to live out such a covenant? I know of only one source – God. He is a covenant keeping God and will help you keep your covenant.


“Husbands love your wives as Christ loved the church and gave Himself for it.” Does that sound “otherworldly”? I, for one, am fully willing to admit that apart from the work of Christ and the ministry of the Holy Spirit in my life I am not likely to be that kind of husband. I am in fact, self-centered and often selfish.

However, there is no question that this is God’s expectation of me and all husbands. As Christians we must not accept the cultural norm as our standard. Rather, we must recognize that in Christ we have the ability to transcend the pull of selfishness and truly become lovers. Few wives will run away from a husband who is loving as Christ loved.

Source of Power

People sometimes say, “My spouse has hurt me so deeply, I don’t know that I can ever love them again.” I understand that when the hurt is deep and the anger fresh, it seems that we cannot love. However, we must remember that God loved us while we were still sinners and sent Christ to die for us. You may say, “That’s God; not me. I can’t do that.”

If you are a Christian, Romans 5:5 tells us that God’s love has been poured out in our hearts through the Holy Spirit. We have received the love of God and now we dispense His love to others. You can show God’s love to your spouse by the way you talk and by your actions regardless of your emotions. When you love, you reflect the character of God.