May 16, 2011
A husband recently said to me, “Why can’t we just forget the past and focus on the present and the future?” I’m empathetic with this husband, but it doesn’t work that way. We must deal with past failures before we can ‘put them behind us’. Otherwise, it keeps popping back up. The first step in dealing with past failures is to identify them.
Where have we failed each other? Most of us can identify our spouse’s failures more readily than we can identify our own. However, Jesus taught that we should first – get the beam out of our own eye. So why not ask God to bring to your mind all of the times when you have hurt your spouse. Write them down. We cannot deal with past failures until we identify them.
May 12, 2011
For many years, I directed the single adult ministry at my church. I believe that singles are often an untapped resource. They are often deeply committed to Christ, and they have spiritual gifts which God intends them to use. However, sometimes the church does not make room for them. All of the church programs are geared to couples and singles feel left out.
If you would like to start a ‘singles ministry’ in your church, may I suggest a resource? The Five Love Languages: Singles Edition is designed to help singles understand their relationship with parents, siblings, co-workers, and dating partners. Applying the love languages to all of these relationships makes the single a vehicle of God’s love.