Q&A: Scoring Equally on the Love Language Profile

Q:  “After taking the Love Language Profile on your website I discovered that I scored equally on all of them. My fiance says I’m needy. Am I crazy?”

Gary Chapman:  People who score evenly on all the 5 Love Languages typically fall into one of two categories. First is the person who has felt loved all their life. Consequently, they are not sure which love language makes them feel loved—they like and are able to receive all of them. I trust that would be your case. On the other hand, there are those who have never felt loved, and consequently, all of the love languages sound good to them and equally so because they’ve never experienced any of them in a healthy way. That is a person who is indeed needy.

I would suggest that you look back in your life to your relationship with your parents and ask:

  • “Was it healthy?”
  • “Did I feel loved in that relationship?”
  • “Have I always felt loved? “

If you can answer positively to each of these questions, then you are in a good position.