Here’s a reality that may help you. Behind every verbally abusive tongue is a person of value. If you believe this, then you can say to the abuser. “I’ve been thinking about us. I’ve been remembering how kind you were to me when we were dating. I remember the kind words, the smiling face and the fun we had in those days.
I guess that’s why I believe in you so strongly. I know the good qualities you have inside. Sometimes, I lose that vision when you scream at me, but I know the kind of man you are and I believe in that man. I know that with God’s help and your desire that man can live again.” Such a statement does not solve the problem, but it does plant a seed.