Category: Single

Whole New Level

Do you know the five love languages? Are you married or single? Did you feel loved by your parents when you were younger? If you are single, how many really close friends do you have? Someone, may be asking, “What’s with the quiz?” To be honest, I’m trying to get the attention of single adults.

I believe that understanding the love languages will help singles build positive supportive relationships: at work, with the family, and in their dating relationships. Learning to receive and give love in all five languages greatly enhances your potential for success. Learning how to identify someone’s primary love language is the key to a whole new level of friendship.

Healing the Past

Life’s greatest happiness is found in good relationships, and life’s deepest pain is found in bad relationships. If you feel loved by your mother, then the maternal relationship brings you feelings of comfort and encouragement. On the other hand, if your relationship with your father is fractured, you probably suffer feelings of abandonment.

Many single adults have felt unloved by one or both parents. In my book The Five Love Languages: Singles Edition, one of the ideas I discuss is how understanding the five love languages can help singles establish or re-establish a more positive relationship with parents. Love holds the greatest potential for healing the past and creating a better future.

Channels of His Love

Are you a single adult who feels that the world has passed you by?  May I assure you that God has a plan for your life. If you have placed your life in God’s hands, then He wants to use you as an instrument of good in the world. First of all, he wants you to love God with all your heart, soul, and mind. Then He wants you to become a channel of His love in all your relationships.

My book The Five Love Languages: Singles Edition, is designed to help you do that. It will help you understand why you felt loved or did not feel loved by your parents. It will teach you how to love others in spite of your childhood. The happiest singles I know are those who have learned how to love others. Love begets love.

Untapped Resource

For many years, I directed the single adult ministry at my church. I believe that singles are often an untapped resource. They are often deeply committed to Christ, and they have spiritual gifts which God intends them to use. However, sometimes the church does not make room for them. All of the church programs are geared to couples and singles feel left out.

If you would like to start a ‘singles ministry’ in your church, may I suggest a resource? The Five Love Languages: Singles Edition is designed to help singles understand their relationship with parents, siblings, co-workers, and dating partners. Applying the love languages to all of these relationships makes the single a vehicle of God’s love.

Euphoric Feelings

Many single adults break up a dating relationship because they loose the euphoric feelings which pushed them along in the early stages of the relationship. In my book The Five Love Languages: Singles Edition, I try to help singles understand that if they can learn and speak each other’s love language, they can keep emotional love alive.

It is not the euphoric state, but it is a deep sense of genuine love. Now, we are better able to access the relationship. Are we really suited for each other? Do we hold enough in common to build a life-long marriage? Now we can base our decision on reality and not simply break up because we lost the euphoric feelings.

Singles Overlooked

More than 4 out of every 10 Americans are single – that’s 89 million. There are at least five categories of single adults:

1)  Never married, 18 years of age and older
2)  Divorced
3)  Separated, but not divorced
4)  Widowed
5)  Single Parents, who also may fit in one of the other categories

I share this with you because I believe the church has largely overlooked single adults.

I felt so strongly about this that I wrote a book that was published by Moody Publishers entitled The Five Love Languages: Singles Edition. So many singles have told me over the past 10 years. “I know that you wrote your original book on love languages for married couples, but I read it and it greatly helped me. Please write a book for us.” So, I did.

Check the Foundation Before You Get Married

Would you like some guidelines for helping you decide whom you marry?

The Scriptures say that when we get married, the husband and wife become ‘one’.  The word speaks of deep intimacy.  If we’re going to have that kind of marriage, then we need a strong foundation on which to build.  That foundation consists of the things you hold in common. Here are a few questions to consider before you marry:

  1. Spiritual Unity: Are you marching to the beat of the same drummer?  If not, in marriage you will be ‘out of step’ with your spouse spiritually.
  2. Intellectual Compatibility: Can you carry on conversations about intellectual matters without arguing?
  3. Values: Do you value the same things?
  4. Socially Compatible: Are you on the same page socially?

Check the foundation before you marry.

Mom's Choice Awards Presented to Love Language Books

The Mom’s Choice Awards has named Dr. Gary Chapman’s The Five Love Languages Singles Edition (Northfield Publishing, 2009), as well as The Five Love Languages of Children (Northfield Publishing, 1997) among the best in family-friendly media, products and services.

The esteemed Mom’s Choice Awards seal helps parents, educators, librarians and retailers wade through an overwhelming number of choices to select quality materials for families.

The Five Love Languages Singles Edition has proven itself a must-read for single adults in all walks of life. This special edition helps readers successfully navigate relationships in the workplace, friendships, and the dating environment. The Five Love Languages of Children explores how speaking the right love language affects and transforms a child’s attitude, behavior, and development.

To learn more about Mom’s Choice Awards, visit www.momschoiceawards.com.

Mom’s Choice Awards Presented to Love Language Books

The Mom’s Choice Awards has named Dr. Gary Chapman’s The Five Love Languages Singles Edition (Northfield Publishing, 2009), as well as The Five Love Languages of Children (Northfield Publishing, 1997) among the best in family-friendly media, products and services.

The esteemed Mom’s Choice Awards seal helps parents, educators, librarians and retailers wade through an overwhelming number of choices to select quality materials for families.

The Five Love Languages Singles Edition has proven itself a must-read for single adults in all walks of life. This special edition helps readers successfully navigate relationships in the workplace, friendships, and the dating environment. The Five Love Languages of Children explores how speaking the right love language affects and transforms a child’s attitude, behavior, and development.

To learn more about Mom’s Choice Awards, visit www.momschoiceawards.com.

6 Questions To Ask Before The Engagement

5LL-single

Possible Proposal? Here are six questions you should ask before popping the question.

1. Are my partner and I on the same wavelength intellectually? (Try one of these exercises: Read a newspaper or online news article and discuss its merits and implications; read a book and share your impressions with each other.)

2. To what degree have we surveyed the foundation of our social unity? (Explore the following areas: sports, music, dance, parties, and vocational aspirations.)

3. Do we have a clear understanding of each other’s personality, strengths, and weaknesses? (Take a personality profile. This is normally done under the direction of a counselor who will interpret the information and help you discover potential areas of personality conflicts.

4. To what degree have we excavated our spiritual foundations? (What are your beliefs about God, Scripture, organized religion, values, and morals?)

5. Are we being truthful with each other about our sexual histories? (Are you far enough along in the relationship to feel comfortable talking about this?) To what degree are you discussing your opinions about sexuality?

6. Have we discovered and are we speaking each others primary love language? (It is in the context of a full love tank that we are most capable of honestly exploring the foundations of our relationship.) meaningful to that person?

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