Love is a choice.
We can request love, but we cannot demand love. We cannot make our spouse speak our love language. However, though we can’t control our spouse, we can control our attitude and our behavior.
The good news is that love stimulates love. And though the object of love is not getting something you want but doing something for the well-being of the one you love, it is a fact that when we receive love, we are far more likely to be motivated to reciprocate and do something our spouse desires.
Choose an attitude of love. Learn the love language of your spouse and speak it on a regular basis. Then, three months down the road, you can say to them,
‘On a scale of zero to ten, how much love do you feel coming from me?’
If they give you a seven, eight, nine, ten—you’re at the top. Or if they say anything less than ten, you say,
‘What can I do to bring it up to a ten or bring it up to a nine?’
They’ll probably give you a suggestion. To the best of your ability, you do that.
Repeat this process every two weeks by simply asking your spouse what you can do to love them better, and taking their answer to heart.
There’s a good chance that, before long, they’re going to say, ‘Well, wait a minute here. I’m turning this around. On a scale of zero to ten, how much love do you feel coming from me?’”
Before you know it, they’ll be working to love you as well as you have loved them.
And that is exactly how love stimulates love.
*This article is one of many featured in Marriage Hacks: 25 Practical Ways to Make Love Last by Tyler Ward.
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